I sat down at the computer for the first time in a while, i have been FBing from my phone a lot lately and I just haven't had time. So tonight as I looked over some lovely blogs that I frequent, I was overcome with a feeling of gratitude for the blessings I have. I am usually the queen of negativity and I sometimes dwell on it for way too long, who am I kidding a lot of the time! But as I sit here listening to the kiddos playing together instead of going to bed, my hubby looking oh so proud of himself for the gifts he bought me himself. (he is a really good shopper!) Gazing at my Christmas tree that I love and my blanket from when I was a little girl wrapped around me. Even though I don't feel great, I feel grateful, for a grandpa who is spending his first Christmas in heaven in a while, and the love that he left behind to my three little children, he was not perfect, he had flaws but he did do something AMAZING!! He was and is a wonderful grandpa to my kids and I miss him, I miss him for them.
This time of year can be so sad for so many people but I need to remember my blessings, need to remember how many things I have been blessed enough to love and care for. I love my family, I adore my children, I have the best friends and my best friend I love more everyday and I cannot imagine my life without him five days after Christmas we will Celebrate 13 years together!! I have a sick twisted ritual that I check off my list every year we are happy together its something only a child of divorce would understand, but the thing is, I cannot imagine being happier with my hubby. We have our challenges and trials but we are solid and I really didn't know if that was possible for love to be like this.
I wish all of you peace and happiness during this season, I wish you hope, wish you small celebrations of tiny happenings and comfort in your own skin. I wish you love. Merry Christmas Everyone! And when your tired and you can't sleep, count your blessings instead of sheep and you'll fall asleep counting your blessings...(White Christmas)
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